Planting season. Ukulima is sweet

[cookie1]

Make up your mind, mara making maney is mbad but specurating in useless pieces of land is ngenius.

Call me when you mbuy rand or property in leafy suburbs of Nai and we can compare notes.  I have a decent real estate portforio in the US and i correct rent in ndorrars every end month. Don't you also ndare try telling me about mortgage, when you are in ndebt you think everyone else is saddled with bank roans. I have zero mortgage, nada, nading, zilch

"My business is to buy prime lots (what we call plots hapa) in key cities all across the world."
They were stunned.

That is the power of the shamba blo.
In fact mashamba mashinani is the smartest investment juu you are getting in on the ground floor.
Did you not hear Nkooks crying that tushambas in Kwiinya are all overpriced?
Na bado.

By 2040 adamant Hamelliikwano Kwiinyans coming home after being forced to swallow their egos  as TSA collapses
will not even be able to afford an eighth in Garbatula!
An acre in Muthaiga might be going for 3B easy.

The summary of the book Rich Dad Poor Dad is simple. Nunua shamba  Hiyo tu.
Shamba is the ultimate passive investment long term no matter whether you play kalongo, dance isukuti or plant beans on it for a hobby.
With improvements on it things skyrocket even more.

Leasing, agriculture na kadharika are the least of our worries blo.

Look at Jomo's wife and shudrens
Selling Northlands at 40 metre per acre
How much do you suppose they bought it for in the 1960s when that whole area was considered uninhabitable bush mashinani?
I bet you not more than 1000 bob per acre because not even fisis and buffaloes wanted to live there.

Note also that electricity coverage in Kwiinya is now 85%
In ten years time if peace prevails and with WSR at the helm we are talking 99%
Meaning the concept of mashinani will be completely nugatory.

I gambled on a dirt cheap shamba Coasto mashinani just to test the waters and found very many watu wa baras are also investing hapo.
The place is very safe and investable. The same is happening everywhere across the nation.
These year I am gonna ramp up more acres hapo (Coasto) big time, God willing.
The infrastructure there is tatty meaning once it comes in- whether ten years from now or twenty - tuko set settuuu
I will be dishing it out northlands styro for an arm and a leg per acre 20 years from now if God lets me survive that long.

I read an article in the gazettis some years back about a jizee saying he had an opportunity to by land in Lang'ata in the 1960s for nothing or near nothing
His wife discourage him BITTERLY Nkooks style so he let the opportunity slip.
At that time Lang'ata was not even considered part of Nairobi per se.
Now you know how much an acre in Langata is going for.

Did you know Mwiki, much of Kasa and surrounding estos were once worthless black-cotton soil scrublands owned by Jomo's clan?
Yep. Now try buying 1/8th in any of those areas today. A metre per 1/8th would be considered a throw away price hapo.

The secret is basically ritru mbit of patience blo. We know what we are doing.

Bottom line, buy up that mashinani land by the tens or hundreds of acres and thank me later blathee.
These secrets are not known by many but now you know.

Ni hayo tu

[.]

Yes some of rural land are cheap. I regret not buying some places in kericho that was going for 120k per acre. These are dry areas like Ukambani that just need water - build huge water dam - and you're in business.
Definitely worth hunting for search land - cheap - because they are dry.
Then fix water problem.

Land in Coasto is now around that level per acre which is dirt cheap by any standards.
But it will not stay there for long 
Malindi suburbs side especially i.e the Galana-Kulalu zone area.
Water probo is very easy to fix. As I said before, with enough overhead, ground level and underground (at least 100k lites)  storage, water harvesting is the way to go, even if you live in the desert! Every place has a certain number of mm annually per year. If you have enough roof area, you will collect more than you need whenever it rains.

[.]

Make up your mind, mara making maney is mbad but specurating in useless pieces of land is ngenius.

As always you missed the point completely but this does not surprise me 
Nothing wrong with owning assets, but do they make one happy once they are acquired? Clearly you might not have achieved the requisite disposition for the answering of this question kama  bado ni kizungumkuti kwako, ama ?
You're the nguy who needs to make up his mind. Is land/property in Kwiinya overpriced or now useless and not worth anything ?

Call me when you mbuy rand or property in leafy suburbs of Nai and we can compare notes.

Peeing contests and juvenile internet fights over nothing are your forte Who told you I don't have real estate in the leafy burbs?

I have a decent real estate portforio in the US and i correct rent in ndorrars every end month. Don't you also ndare try telling me about mortgage, when you are in ndebt you think everyone else is saddled with bank roans. I have zero mortgage, nada, nading, zilch;;

Are we supposed to be impressed ? Those are things we did OVER TWENTY FIVE YEARS AGO hapo TSA, papa.
Besides, what has that got to do with Ukulima/land in Kwiinya ? Stick to topic, blo. You are starting to sound like that Zokwe Kazolo Mkia nguy who was always prating in the wind to nobody in particular and crapping on threads when he was feeling left out 

Ni hayo tu

[Fairandbalanced]

Kila Nyani na starehe zake but the things you are talking about is what my dad’s generation did, plant trees, chicken, honey off grid etc what’s some of us are talking about is upping the game kidogo, the ability to make tonnes of money and enjoy it anywhere in the world. My wife and I visited Maldives, long flight but it was the most romantic I have ever seen her. There are several wazees in my area with USA, UK or Canadian papers, kids abroad. I always admired their lifestyle, Kenya kidogo, abroad kidogo, the best of two worlds. My dad had a friend, he has passed on but this guy used to joke that every time he went on a binge, the only cure for hangover was this soup only sold in London and he would fly out to see his kids and grandkids. I always thought that was the best life ever and fashioned my life around and ambition around it.

[.]

@Pundito you can't go wrong with well waterproofed , reinforced underground tanks as below with a slab ontop



I have a 50k litres one and I am planning to add 2 more over time, plumbing them in series so the water gets purer as each tank sediments out for the next.
Add above ground plastic tanks and an overhead tank for pressure with an automatic silent solar pump in between.
Whenever I am at this particular shamba I have so much water I can barely use even one tenth of it. As I said this rainy season all the tanks are full mpaka the water is overflowing spuuuu which means I need to add those extra tanks asap.

As you well know, water security is critical while off grid.

Shida tu is the locals always coming by to ask for water for free (of course). Woe betide you if you oblige. You will be come the free water point for the whole sub-location

Are you into water harvesting?

My  immediate neighbour some distance away has a borehole but the water is brackish so I did not want to connect to it. Nothing purer than God's fresh rain water all one needs to do is filter it and boil it and it can be drank bila msukosuko wowote,.

Ni hayo tu

[.]

Kila Nyani na starehe zake but the things you are talking about is what my dad’s generation did, plant trees, chicken, honey off grid etc what’s some of us are talking about is upping the game kidogo, the ability to make tonnes of money and enjoy it anywhere in the world. My wife and I visited Maldives, long flight but it was the most romantic I have ever seen her. There are several wazees in my area with USA, UK or Canadian papers, kids abroad. I always admired their lifestyle, Kenya kidogo, abroad kidogo, the best of two worlds. My dad had a friend, he has passed on but this guy used to joke that every time he went on a binge, the only cure for hangover was this soup only sold in London and he would fly out to see his kids and grandkids. I always thought that was the best life ever and fashioned my life around and ambition around it.

Agreed  . What you consider upping the game is what others consider taking 5 steps back because they got tired of it.
Some of us just want to simplify life with no rat-racing stress by enjoying our shambas mashinani.from time to time. Hiyo si dhambi blathee ama?
Now can we stick to topic ?

[RV Pundit]

What makes you think if you're in Kenya you cant fly to Maldives?
Your father and grandfather owned nothing
Maybe 1/4 acre or some small acreage with 10 kids - working for mzungu.
Now you have a chance to own 1,000 acre ranch - and dont have to endure winter.
Get your arse to Ukambani or coast...with 10M...you can buy land where acre is 1,000 dollars...
How many Bazugu move to Kenya to farm.
Nothing stop you from visiting US/EU/China when living in kenya.
For me the only advantage the miserable north have - is money - climate is terrrrrrible.
Winters are cold. Summers are too hot.

I dont understand how African man can get comfortable in such places....

These places are not ideal for african or heck human habitation.

Now it spring - outside - it deathly quiet - inside everyone and their pet.

In nairobi - you life immediately improve by 100% just by being there - best climate - best social capital - something just KICK!

Only problem in kenya is MONEY - you figure that out - you gonna enjoy your life. You can live like a US president or England queen - people opening doors for you...calling your Mkubwa...cheap labour everywhere....

Nobody will ever convince me that abload is better than kenya. Yeah Kenya vis uganda or rwanda or south africa - that we can argue. I have lived in Uganda and Rwanda....before coming to Europe.

Europe I earn so much - but never felt so miserable. Uganda hands down is the best. Kenya second.

ABLOAD - you feel weather..you feel the darkness of your skin..arguably the most terrible feeling in world...from kwinya where everyone is black to a country where you're one or two black people in streets..an unwanted minority....you feel like a foreigner. Your self-esteem just takes a beating..you have to practically do everything for yourself...you have to work extremely hard just to maintain your job...then work hard to cook and clean up and take kids to schools. The only thing you're earning good money.

And for what - good roads or etcs - pretty much Nairobi and kenya has all those things nowadays - Kenya has average of 10 hrs power blackout in a month - internet is way faster than in US or Europe....everything else work...you can get pretty much everything

Kila Nyani na starehe zake but the things you are talking about is what my dad’s generation did, plant trees, chicken, honey off grid etc what’s some of us are talking about is upping the game kidogo, the ability to make tonnes of money and enjoy it anywhere in the world. My wife and I visited Maldives, long flight but it was the most romantic I have ever seen her. There are several wazees in my area with USA, UK or Canadian papers, kids abroad. I always admired their lifestyle, Kenya kidogo, abroad kidogo, the best of two worlds. My dad had a friend, he has passed on but this guy used to joke that every time he went on a binge, the only cure for hangover was this soup only sold in London and he would fly out to see his kids and grandkids. I always thought that was the best life ever and fashioned my life around and ambition around it.

[RV Pundit]

Living abroad to me is a sacrifice you need to raise capital - only reason - make money. Once you have the capital - move to Kenya. If you are able to move back and forth in year - the better. Get best of both world like Bazungus in kenya. Summer go there. The rest of year you're in Kwinya.

[RV Pundit]

Interesting.
No, I have bought properties in Nairobi metro
And the kericho, bomet and nakuru
Thinking of Narok next.
Nakuru - Mau forest - I used to buy an acre for 50k - now its 500-700k
Those I plant trees.

My plan is to semi-retire this year at early 40s - I will oscillate btw Nairobi and Nakuru.

I will check Narok if I can get cheap land.

For me I will only settle in Kalenjin land - mostly fellow kipsigis land - where honour is still a currency.

Security has always been no 1 for me.

@Pundito you can't go wrong with well waterproofed , reinforced underground tanks as below with a slab ontop



I have a 50k litres one and I am planning to add 2 more over time, plumbing them in series so the water gets purer as each tank sediments out for the next.
Add above ground plastic tanks and an overhead tank for pressure with an automatic silent solar pump in between.
Whenever I am at this particular shamba I have so much water I can barely use even one tenth of it. As I said this rainy season all the tanks are full mpaka the water is overflowing spuuuu which means I need to add those extra tanks asap.

As you well know, water security is critical while off grid.

Shida tu is the locals always coming by to ask for water for free (of course). Woe betide you if you oblige. You will be come the free water point for the whole sub-location

Are you into water harvesting?

My  immediate neighbour some distance away has a borehole but the water is brackish so I did not want to connect to it. Nothing purer than God's fresh rain water all one needs to do is filter it and boil it and it can be drank bila msukosuko wowote,.

Ni hayo tu

[Fairandbalanced]

I do not know who told that you cannot buy land here in the USA. My buddy owns 100 acres in the Midwest with a beautiful farmhouse, a creek and a pond. I used to take my kids there to ride ATVs and other recreational activities. I know a few Kenyans with farms in Texas raising goats, sheep etc and making a killing. Everything you guys like about Kenya can be done here too, you want to party and drink all day, you can do that too.

[.]

Interesting.
No, I have bought properties in Nairobi metro
And the kericho, bomet and nakuru
Thinking of Narok next.
Nakuru - Mau forest - I used to buy an acre for 50k - now its 500-700k
Those I plant trees.

My plan is to semi-retire this year at early 40s - I will oscillate btw Nairobi and Nakuru.

I will check Narok if I can get cheap land.

For me I will only settle in Kalenjin land - mostly fellow kipsigis land - where honour is still a currency.

Security has always been no 1 for me.

I like your plan.
50k per acre is a steal! If I were you I would be buying those like a nonsense.
On security, for outsiders I would say Masaini and Coast are excellent options
You never hear of things like mahandamanos or violence even during elections in Urban Masaini - Kajiado town, Ngong, Kitengela, Kiserian and Rongai which though located in Masaini, are literally overrun by outsiders. Same for deep deep deep inside mashinani except in one or two small areas.
Coasto the only issue is squatters. Don't buy land there that is already occupied. Tafuta empty land with nothing on it and once you build your farm infra on there nobody will bother you. Speaking from experience with my test shamba there that I have owned for years.
Don't let the naysayers fool you ati Kwiinya is Hades and crumbling TSA is the place to be.
 I have experienced each side for literally about half my life in each and can tell you for a fact that Kwiinya is better based on all the reasons we have discussed to exhaustion.
Those stuck with a stake there (kids with twengs, investments hapo, possibly a Hamellikwan wife and so on) will of course defend their stay there to the hilt like I used to during my first 10 years hapo. They would find it very difficult to uproot all that and relocate as their kids and wifeys would be like a fish completely out of the water hapa.
TSA is nice while young and excited, it then becomes all downhill from there.
The best of both worlds is as you say - go there, experience life while young, make a ritru money to give you freedom and options, then come full circle back to Kwiinya to batten on the social capital and simplify your life to avoid dying at 60 from TSA style stress.

Ni hayo tu

[.]

I do not know who told that you cannot buy land here in the USA. My buddy owns 100 acres in the Midwest with a beautiful farmhouse, a creek and a pond. I used to take my kids there to ride ATVs and other recreational activities. I know a few Kenyans with farms in Texas raising goats, sheep etc and making a killing. Everything you guys like about Kenya can be done here too, you want to party and drink all day, you can do that too.

Awesome, now instead of getting into peeing contests (a.ka. "Keeping up with the Joneses" -a typically American trait) with us, why don't you stick to topic and tell us how your buddy deals with water issues and maintenance on his 100 acre farm. Or the specs of his solar set up if he has one.
I used to love fishing fishuuuuuuuuu on a  simple boat with a fishing line and bait in the ponds and river systems huko TSA. I just regret that I only discovered the sport late in my stay there.
It's one of the most relaxing things I have ever experienced hapo. I had never understood how folks could spend 6 hours in the water until I experienced the joys of the activity.
I also miss shooting real rifles at the shooting range praaa-taaa-taaa-taaaaa. Good times while young.

[.]

even Obama has decided to move to Kenya
https://www.standardmedia.co.ke/national/article/2001470074/president-obama-to-relocate-to-kenya-in-june

How did I miss this.  It's a no-brainer man. Many envoys came to Kwiinya, bought houses in Naivasha or leafy Nairobi and even married Kwiinyan wives after experiencing the social capital and incredible beauty of nature plus good climate in the tropics. They compared it with their soulless lives majuu and saw the light. Would not be surprised if Barrack Drone-Bomber buys a house or two with many acres while here 

[cookie1]

you've conditioned yourself to think so. we can ndo everything and more hambload. the onry thing we ndont have are relathieves mbut we have established social networks here. my best memories incruding with my folks are right here in hamerica not in kwiinya and they will say the exact same thing.

i once took my friends from kwiinya to a new years eve house party that had 100 people crammed in a mbasement and they still talk ambout it to ndate. every year they celebrate new year's eve in a different country/continent and this one is the mbest they've ever had

Living abroad to me is a sacrifice you need to raise capital - only reason - make money. Once you have the capital - move to Kenya. If you are able to move back and forth in year - the better. Get best of both world like Bazungus in kenya. Summer go there. The rest of year you're in Kwinya.

[.]

 . Farming is therapy, buddies.

Meanwhile as I predicted more than 5 years ago. End of the weaponised USD  . Most folks - especially those clueless about economics and finance - don't understand just how monster this is. Hamellikwa will NEVER be the same again. Its implosion will accelerate by leaps and bounds until gutted ghetto cities and their hapless denizens are left hapo hapo. Meanwhile they are being fed on bread and circuses {Hollywood/TV/drugs/alcohol/GMO food that has made 90% of them clinically obese) to dull their brains and keep them sleeping much like the Roman Citizens were (chariot races/alcohol/endless food to eat etc) right before their empire collapsed into the dustbins of history. The smart ones will understand what I am saying. The dumb ones will still remain clueless as nature intended them to remain.

source; https://www.globaltimes.cn/page/202303/1288282.shtml

Ni hayo tu.

[RV Pundit]

Yeah look likely USD is gone as global currency and US gov with trillion in debt will no longer print it way out.

[.]

Yeah look likely USD is gone as global currency and US gov with trillion in debt will no longer print it way out.

Yeppers! I knew something was seriously wrong when they started printing trillions like TP many years ago (2007/08 financial crisis) and not using it to build productive capacity - infra and manufacturing - but to bail out the "too big to fail" corporates like Goldman, who had committed all sorts of malfeasance, and to bomb countries around the world. The helpless Middle East especially. Meanwhile, most of the US cities were collapsing, the American standard of living was being steadily degraded and municipalities were going bankrupt, while crumbling infra built 60 years go was going to pot, yet the controlled media in the US that was supposed to highlight these issues was saying nothing about it. Just feeding the citizens NBA games, Will Smith Oscars slaps and Kim Kardashian butt-lift style "news," i.e the circuses in Bread and Circuses. Add that the Fed has been fudging numbers - on inflation especially - for the longest. Then the writing on the wall came in black and white when the WEF declared that by 2030 the US will no longer be the world's superpower but just an ordinary nchi tu like any other. I don't know how much more clearer it can get than that . Meanwhile thank God Kwiinya has aligned itself with China in the Belt and Road initiative. All nations that have aligned themselves with the world's next superpower beyond 2030 have a mighty growth curve ahead of them. This is why the Chinese have been investing billions of dollars in projects like the Expressway which are not even turning them a profit yet, because they have long term plans for Afrikwa via Kwiinya

America’s dominance is over. By 2030, we'll have a handful of global powers

https://www.weforum.org/agenda/2016/11/america-s-dominance-is-over/

Run for your acres and buy your jembes and plant your avocado and mango trees buddies

Before the Chinese come and buy up all the land and leave us crying live live that hakuna affordable ardhi left in Kwiinya  .
Africa has the most amount of arable land in the world and Chinaman already knows this. All those growing number of mouths in the Belt and Road zone will need feeding.

Ni hayo tu

[.]

He has access to global intelligence networks/security briefings so he knows what he is talking about 
On another note I forsee a dictator coming to power in the Tattered States of Amellikwa by 2035 as it implodes.
All imploding countries always go the dictator way like Nazi Germany.
But this is just my personal opinion ritru bit, ritru bit.
Ni hayo tuuu

[.]

**double post**

[.]

Na msiseme hamkuambiwa 
China going ham in land acquisition in Afrikwa
Qatar bought 99,000 acres in Kwiinya  because it needs to feed its people.

https://www.brookings.edu/blog/africa-in-focus/2015/11/05/what-do-we-know-about-the-chinese-land-grab-in-africa/



Ni hayo tu